Have ever been in a relationship where your partner continuously complains about you and/or about the things that you do? Or, did they perhaps just make subtle comments, but you knew they genuinely meant it?
These foolhardy acts play on your insecurities and you may have found that you had been changing the things about yourself that they had been complaining about or commenting on in an effort to avoid the criticism and/or comments. They might have also threatened to end your relationship if you failed to change.
You might have convinced yourself because you love the individual it’s a valid and good enough reason to want to change for them. When it comes to dating and relating, it is fear on some level that causes you to adjust for somebody else and not love. Adjustments, regardless of how massive or small, aren’t appropriate if they are for somebody else.
Any time you change anything about yourself to please another, it will have negative consequences. The minute you change one thing, you could be asked to change one more and another and another right up until there comes a point when nothing you do or say is good enough. You are going to find that a relationship where you’re required to change in an effort to make it work will not survive long term.
Anything you do from here on out, when relating to women do not change for anybody else but yourself! If you do, it’s going to backfire at some point simply because you are, essentially, squashing the nature of your true self.
Eventually, those aspects of yourself that you thought you had changed will be doing whatever it takes to express themselves. The essence of your true nature cannot and won’t be held down for long.
More than likely, these adjustments that you initially made from ‘love’ will show itself as anger and resentment towards your partner for whom you did the changing for in the first place. If they do not like who you are, that is not your problem, it really is theirs.
Remind yourself that you decide on who you would like to be with and vice versa. And gently remind them that if those things bother them so much, perhaps you both should consider the possibility that the relationship will not work out simply because you respect yourself.
And that means that you simply won’t alter to fit somebody else’s idea of what the perfect partner really should be like. You are who you are and if they do not like it, they do not need to be with you. If they do not adore and accept you just as you are, don’t be afraid to tell them to take a hike.
Above all else, when relating to women, be honest to yourself, body, mind and soul. You will find that honoring and respecting yourself in that way will more rapidly result in attracting and experiencing a healthy, loving and fulfilling relationship that never even dreamed possible.
